i stopped blogging because i don’t have anything to add to this online journal of mine. but right now, i just can’t keep this thing inside my head anymore… i need to release this before it swells up in me and eats my brain inside-out.

yes friends… despite my seemingly calm nature… I AM TERRIFIED ABOUT MY AROUND-THE-CORNER WEDDING!!! everything scares me… the nikah process… the possible interview on doa qunut, etc… the ceremony… the life of a married man…

what if i stutter (or worse, completely forget) the necessary recitals during nikah? malu weiii…

what if i turn into another person after getting married?

lots of what ifs. too many questions where the answers could only be obtained through personal experience, but it’s the journey that i’m afraid of.

i love yanz now, and insya-allah i’ll be loving her til i die. but i hope we get to sail on the boat of life in the calmest weather possible.

but still… takut siottt!